In Bed

In bed at 11:13 p.m.-

on me- a computer

next to me- a bag of chips, a text book, a cell phone, an APA style guide, a stapler, a hi-liter, a flash drive, a clip board, papers- lots of them.

beside the bed- laundry in a basket. Clean, not folded.

I need an office, a personal trainer, and a maid. Oh, and sleep.

Good-bye Summer

You know what happens the last week of July? Summer DIES. Boo for that.

While most of the county is just getting ready for the dog days of summer, we're getting ready to go back to school. I try not to complain, because it's my job and stuff. I should be thankful for my job, and after all, I teach; this is a calling not just a pay check. It is, however, sad to think that this is the last week of sleeping in, not showering until 3, and not really planning anything.

With all that being said, I actually LOVE going back to school. I love school supplies and all things paper related. I love fall, which is not here, but will be in the blink of an eye with all the school stuff that's going on. I love school so much, that I'm excited to be a student again this fall. I'm getting my masters, and I think I'm going to really like having a challenge. I also am teaching some new classes, so that will be fun too.

I'm trying to be a Positive Petunia rather than a Negative Nancy. How's that workin' for me? Am I believable yet?

Kumbaya

As a kid, I packed it up and went to camp every summer. This summer is my kids' first go-round with life on their own... kind of.

This morning, I went to drop of the big girls feeling a bit rough myself, since the baby decided to throw up in her crib. After that, she decided she wanted to jump in my bed, of course, at three A.M, of course! So, lack of sleep, lack of shower, and I realize I have to (GULP) go in! I looked as though I had just thrown on some flip flops and ran out the door because, well... that's exactly what happened.

As I walked up to the camp's main building, I thought to myself, this seemed so big when I went here. I mean, I could probably throw a ball from one end of the campus to the other, lengthwise and I'm not getting called up to the majors any time soon. When I was my kid's age, I remember thinking that it was a good walk to anywhere there. It's odd how perspective changes with age.

In thinking that our perspective changes, I gained some hope. I've been feeling like I'm getting old, as in, "the old grey mare, she ain't what she used to be." But you know, maybe I was never as fast, as athletic, or energetic as I thought I was. Maybe it's not that I'm getting old, but I've realized what I truly am with grown-up eyes.

So, as my kids learn all the great camp songs this week that I learned when I was a kid, I'm going to re-charge my batteries, and tell myself the truth. I never was as fast as I thought, and I'm not as old as I feel.

And there's the floor!

Would you believe that the junk room has a floor. Yeah, that's right, I found it! I found that it is carpeted, and has only one small stain. So the good news is, I can vacuum and walk in there without fears of dying in there and nobody finding me until the neighbor start to complain about the stench. These things happen you know.

I still have some papers to go through, but oh my goodness, I have a whole other room now! My friend, who was not at all attached to my stuff, made easy work of the mess turning the piles into two trash bags, two give away bags, and a huge burn pile. I tell ya, friends are a good thing to have. I'm liking that I have a few!

Clean out the Clutter

I have a junk room. It is in the back of the house, and was purposed originally to be an office/man cave. Instead, it is the room where everything that I don't know what to do with goes... to die. I have off season clothes (in bins, and out of bins), sizes for when we were skinny, not too far from skinny, and now, and papers. If it came in an envelope, I probably have it in that room. If it came ten years ago, fear not, it's in there somewhere. I have toys with which the big kids, my husband and I, are unwilling to part. I have random junk, and lots of it.

I've decided that this is symbolic of my life. I have stuff that I'm not willing to deal with because it's too hard. I have stuff that I'm not willing to show people because, well, it's horrifying! I have places that I'd just rather close the door and ignore for another day.

Well, today is the day people! I'm going in. If you don't see me in the near future, notify the authorities that I was likely eaten by the stuff that could potentially come alive in that room.

I've invited a friend, not a family member to help. I'm showing off my messiness. I'm willing to load up the car and take away whatever needs to go, and there will at some point probably be a fire to purge the rest!

Wish me luck. I'm ready to deal with life.

Pioneer Woman

Today, I spent way more time in an apron than I normally do. I started this morning doing a mad dash around the house so I could let friends past the front porch when they arrived. I then spent the next few hours making lacto-fermented foods. That's right kids, I jarred up some pickles and some sauerkraut, which involved beating cabbage for 10 minutes. Well, let's hope it's worth it, because that meat tenderizer and I became good friends over this cabbage this morning.

Why would I do this? Well my good friend who is way more health ambitious than I, has done it before, I had a truck load of cucumbers from my garden, and we needed to get together, so tada! A pioneer woman day was born!

After my friend and her 3 girls left, I mowed the lawn while the baby was sleeping. I then showered off real quick, got the baby up, and made homemade chocolate chunk cookies, again while wearing an apron. So, for the rest of the day, I'm pretty well done. I've been productive enough!

15 months

In a couple of days, baby D will be fifteen months old. She surprises me with what she knows already. We don't give babies enough credit!

Yesterday she was insisting I hold her, but I had other plans at the moment. I said, "Just a minute. I can't hold you right now, I have to go potty."

She said, "Ut oh!" Ran to the bathroom, and lifted the lid and got out of my way!

So, you think potty training is in my near future?

No?

Yeah, me neither. Too bad!

This is how I feel. No more cute, pink and brown, or happy stripe.

I've had an amazing week. I've had a hard week.

I've seen temples built by human hands. I've seen tombs to mark their end.

I have heard stories of survivors, and seen the unwritten stories that only empty eyes could tell.

I've had a hard life. Many have had it much harder.

Humbled

Some time, somewhere you will need help. I tend to go until I'm broken so far that I have no idea how to fix myself at all. In that situation, one could stay stuck, or ask for help. Or, in my case, you could have an emotional break down in a very ugly public display of blubbering idiocy.

Today I was humbled. I received help that was very much needed. I allowed someone to see the ugliness and get close enough to the truly mortifying mess to get down, and dirty and help me. I am so thankful for the willing hands and friendship displayed.

I hope I remember how much of a blessing today was for me so I can do this for someone else someday.

Good for the Soul

Confession- I'm not Catholic, but ya know what, they got something going with that whole confession thing. Have you ever pretended for so long that it just becomes your own reality? It may just be keeping up the appearance of being a normal, put- together person, or it could be literal skeletons in your closet. I believe for me it's the prior, but who would know since my closets are not even usable because that would mean carving out a path to get to them.

If I had the money for a maid..., but I don't. In the mean time, if you want to visit, please call a month in advance so I can fold the laundry in my living room, return the dirt on my floors to the great outdoors, and contact a pharmaceutical company about harvesting the potential penicillin in the bathrooms. Also, I think I may take up knitting or something with all the natural fibers I have here, provided by the spiders who live in the corners.

There is my confession. Do not turn me in. Thank you.

Summer Update

With school out, I have had a very busy week. I have gotten a lot done, but oh so much to do! I have cleaned, and sorted through so much kid clutter that we literally filled up an entire truck bed of stuff to go to the dump! It was a good feeling to see it go, but my husband said he was ashamed to be seen in the truck with all that junk! THANKS, babe :)

The girls and I had a fun day yesterday. We were invited to go with a friend to the Creative Discovery Museum. We played there for several hours, and then went to eat out sack lunches outside. After that, we went cardboard sledding and I just imagined how much fun kids up north have in the winter sledding on snow! But hey, Tennessee grass plus cardboard makes for a fun ride.

Today, I'm going to a friend's wedding and I'm hopeful the afternoon showers don't rain on her parade as it is planned for outside. Until then, I'm off to search my wardrobe for something to wear. I'm a little too big for all my summer dresses to look good, so I'm going to try on every skirt I own until something is semi-flattering. NO, I'M NOT CALLING MYSELF A SEMI! HA!

By the end of this summer, I'm hopeful to not be in this predicament. Friday is my weigh in day, and I'd like to loose about two pounds a week. If you'd like to join me, please do! It's always fun to have friends along for the ride!

I take it back...

So, my incredibly technologically talented husband fixed the Internet router, so we are doing WITH again! Yippie!

This week will be horribly busy, so I don't intend to have a grand re-appearance on my blog of any sort, but hey I'M BACK!

Goodbye

I am quitting. Our house got struck by lightning, which killed our Internet router, so we are going to do without for a while. I'm going to be out of the loop; no blog, no email, no facebook. I'm hopeful that this means a much more productive and meaningful life. I'll miss this and you though.

I have not done a post in a long time. I am so stressed that I can't even think. If I can't think, I can't write. Here's a bullet list of some things I'm grateful for:

• A weekend vacation for the cost of gas to get there.
• A can of formula that I'm fairly sure God somehow snuck into my cabinet.
• A lost, but found wedding band.

Praises and Request

Today I got the most amazing news I have had in a long time. A few months ago, I had two different boys in two different classes strike up a conversation about Christianity, or more importantly, their lack of. I teach in public school, so I don't get to share my thoughts on these issues every day, but when I'm asked, I give my view. They were obviously searching, and my heart was so heavy. I had very honest conversations with them both, and have prayed a lot for the seeds to take. Today, just out of the blue, one of the guys said, "Hey, I got saved this weekend." Whoa! I gave him a high five and let him know that I have been praying to that end. Thank you, Jesus!

Noel, the biggest, had a school play this evening, and she had a pretty big part. I was more nervous than she was. Until she actually had to speak, then I think she won the prize! But I quickly said, "Lord HELP her!" She clasped her hands together, took a deep breath, and she was off. She did perfectly.

And then, there was the issue of the heater. Our heat has been out, and we didn't know why but it has been warm, so we were fine. Tonight, we're having a cold snap, and thankfully, the hubsters got the pilot light going... AND we are warm!

But, the night is ending on a low note. The dog that came with the hubsters is not well. He's laying in the yard on this cold night, unable to get up and come in. We don't know exactly what's wrong, but things do not look good. This dog has nursed many wounds for my husband's spirit. I took out some blankets to wrap up Bohdi, but wish I could do so much more.

Busy Weekend

This weekend was busy! I offered to watch my sister's two kids (2 and 6) and then of course had my three (1,7, & 9). That's a big lot of kids! And while we were all playing in the yard, and trying to pull toys out of the over-crowded garage, the kids said, we need to have a garage sale. I said, " Yep, let's do it!"

So, baby on my hip, imagine me pulling out junk to the edge of the yard. The kids made a sign for the mail box, and gathered some of their neglected toys. Nothing priced, nothing planned, just doing it! Now keep in mind that I live right in the middle of four fields, so we got NO traffic. As I was prepared to pack it in for the day with nothing sold, the girls insisted we at least inform the neighbors of our excellent sale. Their charm alone earned $14.00!

Then I went to meet up with my Titus 2 mom, I call her. In my church that I attended about six years ago, in Georgia, I had a mentor and she was in town for a meeting at my new church so we got together. It was IN- CREDIBLE. I hadn't done anything without children in tow for weeks and weeks!

Sunday we went to church, which was incredible, at least the part I heard before I had to walk the halls with a restless baby. Then we went to get the girls' pictures made, and had some of the baby for her first birthday. Then grocery shopping and by the time I got home and put everything away, I was cooking supper at 7:00. Now, I'm waiting on the washer to beep at me so I can give the dryer a job for the night.

26 Days of school left!! Woo-hoo! Here we go!

Apple Juice and Orajel

It's 3:08 a.m. I am sitting watching the baby have some apple juice while I pray for the Tylenol and Orajel to work its magic. Please, oh please.

I haven't been to sleep yet, and neither has my husband. We have listened to lots of crying. We have watched every lullaby video that YouTube has to offer. I have had my index fingers chewed almost to the nubs, but none of this is any match for the wicked one-year molars.

Funny that today she was blowing out her one year candle. It's as if her molars were just waiting for that moment. I'd just like to say, that we showed them! Her real birthday isn't until Monday. HA! I'm glad that I'm not going to work tomorrow! This cutting molars business is definitely weekend work.

Frustration

The worst thing about a break is that it must come to an end. I always have a list of things to do a mile long and a foot wide, and I never get to anything but one or two. Today is the last day of Spring Break for me. Well, yeah, I have Sunday, but that's not really a get stuff done day. So, I'm frustrated because it's well into the afternoon and my house is a wreck, my mower won't start, and I can't get anything done with a baby who has decided it is her mission in life to cry for the longest amount of time one breath can sustain.

I am frustrated. I can't breathe. I need a break. I realize I've just had a week long break, but I feel like I've not had a break at all. I've cleaned; I've babysat; I've mothered; I've laundered. I've listened to a lot of crying, and now I'd like to join in.

BOO HOO!

Out of Order

Today I had to go here.

When I opened D'arcy's car door I found this.

She had gotten into the diaper bag that I had sitting in between her car seat and her older sister's. She managed to pull out a small can of formula and pull off the lid emptying its entire contents onto the seat and in between the door and seat.

Thankfully this was next door.

Genius! Whoever thought to put a car wash next to a pediatrician's office must have had a kid or two get sick in transit. Perfect!

Only one problem. NOTHING worked. I noticed a large lake in one stall (you can see in the photo if you squint just right). And then, I saw the big huge for sale sign. Boo.

So, now the formula powder is probably making milk fumes in my car as we speak.

One More Round

I've been sick for five weeks. FIVE.

Since I felt like I was getting worse rather than better I went back to the doctor again today.

I was prescribed the strongest oral antibiotic that you can take orally. I was given a coupon with the prescription note because as the nurse said, it's was expensive.

I was thinking ok, it's going to be a twenty-five dollar co-pay, rather than the five I usually spend for the regular kind of antibiotic.

I was right, it was twenty-five which wasn't too bad, but I was shocked to see that the full price without insurance would be $152... for five pills. REALLY!? I mean I want to feel better and all, but what is this I'm buying? CRACK?

I'm so thankful to have insurance, and I feel so sorry for people who can not get insurance for whatever reason.

Seeds

Yesterday was beautiful! I even got a sunburn during my lunch break. It was fantabulous.

I was so inspired by the warmth and sunshine that I started my garden. I've never had a garden before, so I'm very excited to see how it all turns out. I started onions and roma tomato seeds in a miniature greenhouse like this (mine is bigger). We'll see how it turns out. I got a tad impatient counting out seeds. You're only supposed to put 2-3 seeds per pellet of dirt. I'm sure some of my pellets have about 10. I'm guessing that might not work out so well...

I also got some lettuce plants which I planted right into my flower bed. HA! Ornamental lettuce for dinner anyone? I'm interested to see how that looks. Tulips and Romaine. NICE! I planted a cherry tomato plant in a pot, and I got a strawberry plant for the girls. If they get one strawberry a piece out of it, I'll be pleased.

Consistency

Friday it was about 70 degrees. Today it was snowing. This back and forth happens every spring, and every spring I'm aggravated by the lack of consistency. I was thinking back on my yearly frustration this morning, and I had to laugh at myself.

1. What will my frustration change? NOTHING.

2. How can I be upset at lack of consistency when I myself have none. Yep, NONE. Well, maybe a little. Give me a minute to waffle back and forth on that answer.

So, this spring I am going to try something different. Rather than complain, or in my head curse the cold snaps, I'm going to be counting them down with thanks. In January I would have been glad to have dogwood winter, blackberry winter, and all the other spring cold snaps that coincide with things blooming. Therefore, I am going to be happy for them in March and April. We have to have the dogwood winter to enjoy the blooms, so here we go... One cold snap down, and a lot more to go.

Willows

Why do willows weep? They make me so stinkin' happy! Weeping willows are always the first tree with green in the spring. Then the Bradford pear trees aren't far behind. You know what I saw today? A GREEN willow tree!

I will take thank you comments below as I just put in a request for spring several days ago.

You're welcome.

Need for Spring

For four weeks, my husband has been sick. For two weeks, the baby has been back and forth to the doctor. For three weeks, I've been fighting- kicking and screaming- to not get more sick.

I NEED SPRING!

I need to open all the windows and feel the warm air and cool, fresh breeze.

I need to spring clean and get all the germs out!

I need some sun and warmth so all these colds will go away!

Oh, and I need some flowers... The kind that are free in my yard are the best.

A Glimpse

Yesterday held much drama in our house including jumping up from the dinner table to give the Heimlich maneuver to my oldest daughter, and then later in the evening the kitchen faucet detached itself and shot like a rocket across the kitchen spraying water as its contrail all the way into the living room. With all that mess, it was a couple of little things, not big events, that really made an impression on me and made me think about how God feels.

First, I was in the bank and the teller was going over and beyond the call of duty to find the color of sucker my girls wanted. She was digging down to the bottom of the box for orange, and she didn't have to do that at all, she was just being nice. I made sure the girls told her thank you, and about that time, the man at the teller next to me, was just being rude! He said, "Well today would be good. I don't have all the time in the world." I know people do this kind of thing all the time especially to people who work in customer service, but I would never, NEVER say that to someone. She was obviously doing her job as quickly as she could do it. He was leaning into what I would consider her space, so he knew she wasn't sitting at her computer playing solitaire. How could he think that his rudeness would help her in any way? What would that accomplish for him? Did it make him feel better to get his thoughts out in the open? By the look on his face, I don't really think so.

I was driving down the road, pondering these questions when a driver stopped at a stop sign caught my attention. As big as life he flipped me off, gave me the finger, shot me the bird! And then, waved his hand as if to say, "Hurry it up lady! I don't have all day!" I looked at my speedometer and I was going five miles an hour OVER the speed limit. I was going as fast as I felt I could go, all-be-it, 35 isn't that fast. At this point I started thinking about how everyone is in such a hurry that they just totally discount other people's feelings. It's all about the personal agenda, and what's not getting done because other people are getting in their way.

I again, began to think about how I would never treat someone like this, but that's when it hit me. I think I just got a glimpse of my ugly nature, not toward other people, but toward GOD! How terrible is that? No, I'm not cursing God ever, or just demanding, but I so often get caught up in my own agenda and why things aren't happening on my schedule. But God does things as quickly as they need to happen; He's not up there playing solitaire! He knows I want to go, do, and get things accomplished, but sometimes His schedule and mine aren't in sync. I wonder if He ever says, "Lorissa, I know you're in a hurry, but your negative attitude isn't going to move this along any faster."

So, I can just be in the bank and wait patiently. I can drive down the road and wait for the lady going the speed limit (OK, five over). Can I wait for my Lord to work? I'm sorry that sometimes I'm the one telling Him to get on with it, when he knows and is doing the best for me already. Logically, it makes no sense to be trying to hurry God along. It's just too bad that most people are guilty of this, and it made me sad to think that I make God feel the way that man in the bank made the teller feel, or the way the man at the stop sign made me feel. What an glimpse of ugliness. Now THAT is why we need Jesus.

For the Moms of the Chronically Ill

Last Friday was spent taking Baby D to the doctor. An antibiotic and steroid later, and she was still very ill. Yesterday was spent taking her back to the doctor. A breathing treatment, and inhaler later, we were able to come back home. I waited for my appointment at 4, for which I arrived at 3:40, until 5 to see the doctor. We weren't out of there until 5:30. That put me in rush hour traffic, yay. I had to go to two different pharmacies in two different towns. I didn't get home until 8 P.M.

Did I mention I left the house that morning at 6:50 A.M.? That's a long time to be out!

After getting home, I still had to give the baby two puffs of albuterol, and the effects were mind-blowing! If only I could contain that much energy into such a tiny tube and partake whenever necessary! Here is evidence of her energy. It is blurry because she was jumping uncontrollably.

But all of this is to say that I feel so sorry for all the moms who deal with chronically ill children every day. I know several moms who have children that require a lot of medical attention, and my heart just goes out for them. I'm sure you come to a new normal, but I'm exhausted after just a few days, much less after every day. God bless your efforts on behalf of your children.

Oscar

You say Oscar. I say Mayer.

Everyone is all a buzz with which actor will win what. Who is wearing whom? The speeches, the honors, the passed over is all crammed into three hours. It's like Junior High all over again.

I remember the first time I went shopping for TIGHT jeans. I believe I was in forth grade. I got the smallest possible size I could sit comfortably in, and then got the next size down off the rack before I let mom see for the final approval. "Nope, too tight," she said.

But MOM, that's the style. I can't be seen wearing jeans that look comfortable, or that might still fit in a couple months! I need the tightest, painted on looking, lay on the bed to zip jeans I can get. I guess looking back I can be thankful that I had a mom who was looking out for me when I was too foolish to know that you need to be able to breathe in your clothes. Obviously, not all girls have that, and it makes me sad for them.

I've been shopping for prom dresses (Yes, I'm 30 and going to prom. What's your point?) And I'm pretty picky about what I'll be seen in. There is no red carpet, there are no cameras to speak of, and certainly no teenager cares what I look like, but I care! So, how do these girls not rethink some of these Oscar fashions? I don't really care about the awards since I won't see the movies until they come out on Netflix! So here is my fashion review for 2010.

Well, by mine, I mean somebody else's but I would have said the same thing!

Hope- The Antithesis of Cynicism

My baby girl is very sick. She has the croup and is just miserable, which as a mom is one of the worst feelings. You know there is really nothing you can do, but what you can do, and when that's not enough and they are still miserable, you can only hope and pray that this will pass quickly for everyone's sake!

Pray and hope. Hope and pray. It sounds trite, but really I'm working on learning to hope again. I've been through a lot in the last ten years. A lot of life has been packed into my early adult years, and you know when you're packing that means you'll be carrying around baggage. In my cynical mind, I've become self sufficient because it's just easier to not get disappointed. If you never hope for anything, you're never let down when nothing happens. BUT THEN NOTHING HAPPENS!

My husband is fairly miserable with his job situation. It's taking him away from the family a lot, it's an hour drive each way, and it's not as if he's driving for killer pay. Cynical me would be so wrapped up in the fact that this is probably as good as it's going to get, but I'm holding on to hope that the Lord has something fantastic in store for him. God can do this! Yes, the job market is depressed, and we're thankful to have jobs, but God can do this.

God can heal. God can provide. Hope and pray. Pray with hope.

UPDATE!!

Within an hour of this original posting, my husband called to say that he has a new position within the same company with fixed hours of 8-5 M-F. Praise the Lord!

Party of Five

On any given school day, here is my schedule.

I wake up at 5:20-5:30 depending on how many times I smack the snooze button.
Hit the shower right after I get the coffee going. I get out and get dressed. In our house, that usually entails me hunting in the dark and trying to let my husband sleep.

6 a.m. I wake up the two biggest girls, get breakfast going for them and dry my hair.

If the hairdryer doesn't wake up the baby, I get her up and give her a bottle and some cereal. When she's in her highchair, I do whatever else I need to to get out of the house.

7 a.m. Load up the car.

7:15 School drop off
7:30 Babysitter drop off
7:50 Frantically rush into my school to sign in and get ready for first period which starts at...
8:00 a.m - 3:00 p.m. I'm in teaching mode.
At 3:00, the taxi service is up and running again.
3:15 get big girls
3:30 get little girl.
4:00 home! change clothes, get girls a snack, and start supper.

We eat early so I can get everyone bathed and in bed.
from 4:30- 5:30, it's homework, piano practice and stories of the day.
5:30- eat
After that, we clean up what we can and leave the rest undone. Boo for that.

7:00 Bath time for kids
7:30 Bed time for baby
8:00 bed time for big kids
9:00 I'm either asleep or getting some cleaning done.

THIS is why I LOVE SUMMER.

In the summer, I have no schedule!

Prayer Power

True confession time. I've been a lazy prayer for a while. Just snippets here and there as things came to mind, but seriously neglecting the devoted prayer. In my head, I thought that was OK because after all, I was praying in a way that was unceasing. However, our Sunday school class has been reading Paul Millers, A Praying Life, and I've been very convicted about my wrong thoughts on prayer.

1. As a believer in predestination (I know many people struggle or just discount this idea, but hear me out), I kind of just came to have the attitude that things were going to happen the way they were going to happen regardless.

2. Praying without ceasing meant an on-going, but not devoted chunk of real time.

3. Praying without ceasing meant I could multi-task. Wash my hair and pray, wash my dishes and pray, wash my car and pray- you get the idea.

4. The Holy Spirit- who intercedes on our behalf could just pray for me. I'm tired!

Now, I'm learning what I was missing!

1. Prayer changes things! I'm thinking predestination is one of those "too lofty for me to understand" topics, but if nothing else, praying about things can at least change our attitude about what's going on and give us grace to deal with it. I do think however, that prayer can change things and we can't just wait for our fate.

2. As Miller says, you can't build a relationship on sound bites. AMEN!! It's like I've been texting God. He's got more for me than a text or tweet size message. THANK YOU, LORD!

3. Yes, I can pray while I'm doing all my washing, but I don't really get that stillness that my soul needs. I need both! OH, and God wants time with me and my little text-style relationship is leavin' Him in the cold.

4. YES, the Holy Spirit is willing and able to intercede, but that doesn't get me off the hook. That's like my children always asking me to tie their shoes. I CAN, and I'm willing, but I can't follow them around for the rest of their lives helping them tie their shoes now can I? I would be handicapping them to deal with life.

So, my analogies and examples my be lack luster, but they make sense to me. I'm praying more, and I'm already seeing the difference. Normally, the morning is about the worst time EVER. The kids who by lunch can be best friends are picking each other apart like vultures. This morning, I prayed for each of them by name and concentrated on their weaknesses. OH MY GOODNESS! THE GRACE and MERCY that FILL MY HOME!! How exciting!

Dribble it! Pass it! We want a basket!

We did it!! I did it!! I got my children through an entire season of Upward basketball! I'm so proud. We didn't miss a game, (except the one where we were snowed in, and the valley wasn't). I made it through two months of weekend games at 9 a.m. every week. I did this on my own, as the hubster was usually working. I, a mother of three, got us there in the proper uniform color, at the proper gym, on the proper day... and now, WE ARE D. O. N. E.

I'm so proud of the girls. They learned so much, and the middle child in particular has grown as a person. They've learned the art of winning and loosing well (although they don't keep score). They've learned to take a ball to the face with the best of them. They've learned to clean the gym floor with their bare knees, and still get up and play some more.

I've learned that it's worth every minute of a messier house because my Saturday was taken. I've learned that it's worth every gallon of extra gas to get them there. I've learned that the baby can have a blast with no toys but a metal chair to bang on.

Now, I've been asked to coach next year. Will that be worth it too? I'm not sure...

On your mark. Get set. CLEAN!

Monday. I know it's so overdone to hate on Monday, but seriously, it's rough. Whatever gets done on the weekend seems to get all undone on Monday alone. Does anyone else share this experience? Please tell me I'm not alone.

Anyway... I began my freaking out when my neighbor came to my door after the bomb had already gone off for the day. After he walked out the door, I literally walked to the fridge to bang my head against it. WHY?! of all days do people think that just dropping in is ok? It's not, just so you know. I do not run a drop in house. I run a call and stall for five minutes to give me a chance to at least clear a path to the door kind of house.

So, after seeing my mortification, all my peeps pitched in. I was blown away with how much got done in such a short period of time. My kids can clean? Who knew! I usually expect their cleaning to consist of mostly complaining and very little productive work, but today they rocked my socks! Hubby grabbed the broom and scrubbed the stove top. The girls cleared the table and scrubbed random surfaces with Clorox wipes. In the end, I realized there is hope. I've been toying with the idea of getting a cleaning lady, but what do you know, I've got an extra two cleaning gals who will work for room and board. HA!

Sushi!

I went on a date. DO you hear me? A date, with no children or any other reason to be going to the "big city" except to be courted! It was fan-flippin'-tastic!

For the first time ever, I ate sushi. Not just a roll containing sushi, but a real slab of red fish. It was not so bad. I actually would do it again. More than anything I'm super proud of myself for my choices. I ordered scallops instead of steak or chicken. I had tuna, smoked salmon, California roll, and some other roll. I also did all of this with no liquid courage! Something I never thought I would do, especially stone cold sober. HA! No, I really don't drink THAT much, but it doesn't take a lot for me to feel pretty brave.

My husband and I were discussing when we last went out, and I say it was before we were married. He thinks surely we went on at least one date in the last two plus years, but I beg to differ! But all that being said, I kept my Lent commitment! I know it's been less than a week, but still, I'm excited!

Lent

No, not "You lint licker!" (click to watch) from the commercial. Lent, the liturgical season prior to Easter to set your mind on things above. That's my definition anyway. I'm not Catholic, or Orthodox anything, but I'm marking Lent this year as a personal offering. It's not going to be easy. I'm giving up drinking calories so to speak. No alcohol, no soda, no sugary beverage. OUCH.

It only 40ish days, right? Well, if Jesus could go into the desert for that long (with no soda) I can live here with no soda! HA!

I didn't have coffee this morning either because as I start this I want to do a week without adding sugar to things either. I'm trying to take this opportunity to spring clean the temple so to speak. I just got back from the grocery store with mostly fruits and veggies, no red meat, and tofu. Yep, I said it, tofu. We'll see what the hubster has to say about this.

So, anyone else need an accountability partner for this Lenten season? I'd love to hear what you're giving up.

Crock Pot Woes

I made chili in my crock pot yesterday. I left it on for my husband who wasn't at home for dinner. I went to bed early. I woke to find my chili fused to the bottom of the crock pot. I believe I killed it.

Calling all Cooks

I need some inspiration in the kitchen. If I can't spice things up somewhere in my life, I'm likely to do something crazy like cut off all my hair which I will sorely regret at this point.

I work. I have three small children. I don't have time for much, but I still cook when I get home. I don't really have GOOD recipes for my crock pot, and frankly I don't want to fill it up with a bunch of stuff that end up tasting yucky. I'm not a planner when it comes to food. I buy what's on sale. ONLY. I have the standard pantry items, but no, I do not have tahini paste. If you can deal with my limits, hit me up with some food ideas!

Comments people, comments!

When you Wish upon a Star

Last week, I stayed up late and feverishly crunched numbers for the IRS. Okay, who am I kidding?! I'm an English major; I let Turbo Tax crunch for me, and I hit submit. But anyway, I got all excited to start thinking about all the money I was going to get back.

Oh, the options! I could take the family to Disney World.

I could re-do my kitchen. It's much needed!

I could pay to get the roof redone. It's very prone to leak.

There's this spot in the bathroom floor that's been damaged by water, and really the entire floor must get ripped out.

All of a sudden, it doesn't feel like all that much money. Especially when I put it up against my debt. If I can owe for it, I probably do. We've had a rough few years, and now it's all piled up.

So, there will be no trip. Stay strong Mickey; I will come see you again someday.

There will be no kitchen makeover. Stay strong Candice Olson; I'll call you for your Divine Design as soon as possible.

There will be more roof patching. Stay strong Dad! I need your roofing skills.

The floor will continue in sponginess. Stay strong floor surrounding the spot! PLEASE don't fall through!

The IRS will send me money, and I will pay it forward... to those I owe. Not fun, but obedient. I'm slowly going to buy myself back from slavery. I'm not going to wish on a star; I'm going to pray. I'm not sure my dreams will all come true, but I'm hopeful God will bless this.

"The rich rules over the poor, and the borrower becomes the lender's slave" (Proverbs 22:7)

Hey, Momma!

At school today, I began an introduction to the novel The Outsiders. To give the students some framework for the time period, I played a clip from Hairspray. The kids got a kick out of John Travolta mainly, but I wanted them to have a visual of popular culture during the 60's.

We then went to the library and listened to two ladies talk about their childhood memories of the decade. The kids were truly unable to fathom all that they lived without. The kids then had to find some 60's slang words, popular foods, world leaders, racially motivated events, and so on.

First of all, these kids have no concept of the world outside of themselves. It's sad really. They are totally out of touch with how the world was before they came along. So, when in doubt, I'm proud to say they ask. It's taken until this point in the year to convince these kids that they need to ask, but really, I thought I might have to hit someone today.

More than one time, at least once a period, I would have a kid say, "Mrs. Kelly, when you were growing up in the 60's..." Can I just say, WHAT? REALLY?! I'm 30! What is wrong with these kids? Clearly they are both historically and mathematically challenged.

Anyway, here's for you to enjoy.

The Little Things

I'm copying Kelly's Korner because simple pleasures are what get me through!

This week I'm especially thankful for power. Electricity is something you take for granted until you loose for over 50 hours. But the ice and snow was pretty! Oh, another simple pleasure- SNOW DAYS!!

I love seeing D'arcy's proud face when she's figured out something new... even if it's how to make a mess! Ha!

I love butterflies. They are my reminder that God loves me and can transform the ugly into the beautiful.

Other things I love-

I love to get into clean, warm sheets. Even better, getting into clean, warm sheets with a window open and a spring breeze.

I love the anticipation of a new school year. Buying school supplies was my favorite time of the year, and now it's my girls' favorite.

Hot cocoa with marshmallows.

An unexpected note from my husband.

Being with family, playing games, and making memories.

Stones

Remember the toxic dream I wrote of? (See previous post)

Yeah, well dehydration can lead to kidney stones. I have recently learned that these are no fun.
So, drink your water kids, drink your water.

Dreams

On Sunday, I woke with a start. The dream I was in was so spooky, I had to get out! Really, the baby was crying, so I thankfullydidn't get to see how the dream ended.
This is how the dream went...

I awoke to my cell phone ringing. I answered and on the other end was a recording of my own voice. The recording of me said, "This is Lorissa. I died yesterday and I need your help." In my dream, that was enough for me to freak out and I threw my phone. Somehow I instantly knew what was going on. Someone intended to kill me and send a recording of my own voice to all of the contacts in my phone just to "mess with" people. Somehow, they inadvertently sent the recording before they killed me. So, now I knew that someone intended to kill me, but that's all.

Thankfully I woke up, for real this time. I went to feed the baby and a few minutes later I heard a child running down the stairs. The middle child came running in the baby's room, falling on me, arms catching herself around my neck. Big tears falling down her cheek, she's goth through the sobs that she had a bad dream, "the worstest dream ever," to be exact. Asking what happened, she was able to get out that I left her.

GULP! "Like I went on vacation?" I asked hopefully.

"No! You left us FOREVER!"

"Where did I go?" Fully expecting that she, too, had a dream about me dying.

"You left us to go to New York!" She sobbed.

Great, now I'm dying AND going to hell I thought.

I posted the gist of this on my Facebook page, and I got a lot of interesting responses. I even researched dream meanings a bit to see what all this could potentially mean.

Basically what I got out of all of this was that something is ending and I feel like I need help. To that I say, "DUH!" I also learned that if you dream that you are awake, but are in fact still sleeping, it's called a toxic dream. This made me realize that it had been literal days since I had even one glass of water. So, I don't think the dream was because of something I ate, watched, or knew subconsciously.

I hear that dehydration can cause some crazy stuff, like going crazy. So, I'm drinking my water in between key strokes and I hope that extends my life line.

What I've been doing

I'm sure that all two of my readers (husband and sister) are wondering why the blog has been so neglected, but as I tend to talk to them from time to time, they know I've been busy.

Doing what? So glad you asked!

I've been moving. Yes, moving. Now, now, don't get hysterical. Just within my own house. Upstairs, went downstairs and vice versa. It's a lot of work! I think perhaps harder than moving from one house to another. You have to imagine rush hour traffic, but with heavy furniture and an infant under foot. Good times.

In my free time, I've been teaching school and being homemaker extraordinaire. So, if you like to move stuff, come help me. It's getting old.